Why is trusting yourself paramount?
“Complete trust in yourself and your intuition is the greatest gift you can give yourself…” - Elisha May
Why? Because it brings you the greatest freedom; for you to be you, to pursue the life you want and to live the way you want, which at present can be known as unconventional, but for some it might be more of the conventional way, and that’s absolutely okay, as long as it’s in alignment with your soul, it feels right and you are happy.
At some point in our human race it will just be normal to live the way you want to live life, whatever that looks like, but at present there is still so much stigma and judgement as to what is “right” and an accepted way to live.
Living and making decisions from your heart, in alignment with your soul and the universal life force that is everything, is normal and always has been, just not everyone knew about this, but slowly and surely it’s becoming widely known that this really is the way humans are meant to live in this world. Be true to yourself!
So, trusting yourself is key, I hadn’t always and it took me years (and I mean years, like 10) to truly begin to trust myself again. I was always aware of my intuition as a child, teen and young adult, but sadly, after making what I thought was an intuitive decision, came the onslaught of a decade of trauma and chronic stress…
First, it was the nanny job in NY, where I lived with the family and my employer sadly spent 9 months gas-lighting me. I remember thinking at the time, I can beat this, my inner child has got this, we’ve got this, just keep going, you can do this, we don’t quit, just make it through to the last month, then you can travel the US and be FREE! But alas, it got so bad with the emotional abuse I left early, came home and it took me a while to learn I had PTSD (I couldn’t leave the house for the first week without someone being with me, as I was so in fear of being attacked), but this didn’t really come into my awareness until after my brother took his life a year later (I thought I was just jet-lagged and being silly), when I had even more trauma to deal with, plus the tsunami of grief that was about to come my way… So I went into a few years of deep grief, depression, self-rejection etc…
So after that experience, I really began to doubt myself, my intuition, my decisions, why would my soul want me to have these experiences… it doesn’t make sense…
Years later and with a lot of healing, I know I needed to go through these experiences, because they have made me who I am today, I am able to relate to so many people, I am able to coach and heal others in a profound way, because I have the capacity to feel and understand what they are feeling and going through.
I have also had some incredibly awesome experiences spiritually, which counter the pain (but I didn’t think this at the time), because in this life there is pain and joy, they are the same coin, but suffering and being stagnant is a choice. I was suffering and stagnant for many years post trauma, feeling lost and dis-empowered, in the wrong relationship and career. I just didn’t listen to my heart and soul properly, I felt burnt, tired and just feared rocking the boat as my system was just done-in.
Somehow, during these years of my own pain and healing, I was able to show up for others who were in difficulty; with one of my careers as a beauty therapist I was often giving my clients healing and coaching (without really realising I was, other than they felt better for seeing me, which was normal to me), as well as the treatments, so I was able to see what I could offer people with all this knowledge and understanding, which led me to be passionate about coaching and healing others now.
In my darkest hours in NY, I remember this intuitive feeling and idea in my heart that I wanted to make others feel happy and be creative and I am now living that dream, so I want this for everyone who wants this too, to live life doing things you are passionate about. Because there is a reason why we are passionate about things - but that’s another blog for another day!
The reason we have to trust ourselves is because we are the ones that have to live with ourselves, every moment of everyday. Just as we are told to trust our friends or partners, we’re not really told to trust ourselves implicitly; which for me is far more important, as other people’s opinions aren’t often helpful even if they mean well.
Society sells us stories that following your heart is silly, it leads to frivolous empty lives, to lack, irresponsibility… Yet, the evidence is quite the opposite, yet we are not told stories about those that dared to listen to their knowing and trust they were being guided to something bigger and better. People like Steve Jobs (I love this video of him speaking here, Martin Luther King, Gloria Steinem, Florence Nightingale etc, etc. The list goes on… And even those they are not well known, have gone on to live lives that truly fulfill them.
When I began to trust myself again a few years ago, magic started to happen, little things would flow more easily, people or mentors that I needed, finding out I was High Sensory. Last year I got this idea to get a side job (as much as I didn’t want to) while I trained and launched my coaching business, so I went with it, tried to analyse it as I couldn’t understand the prompt in me getting a few hours a week working, to delivery parcels (because my beauty therapy didn’t pick up after covid - but I knew in my heart I was ready for change), but I went with this and it’s really helped me financially, emotionally and mentally; it was the stepping stone I needed, the new foundation. It got me out of the town I live in, which I am very keen to do (have done a few times, but keep coming back after the “wrong” decisions were made where I didn’t really listen to myself), and it’s helped fuel this fire of travelling again, which lead me to spend 3 months on a Greek Island at the beginning of this year. It also lead me to work with a fellow Empath, my manager, who needed my skills to see her true potential as she felt stuck, knowing working there wasn’t what she was born for, and so I needed that sign, that I really was born to help others to align with their passions and gifts.
When I trusted societies expectations of me, when I trusted people older than me, or friends that “had it”, the “right life”, even if it didn’t resonate, I acted on their opinions/advice, but I was always unhappy, I just felt empty inside, trapped, confused, anxious and lost.
So each decision we make, must be from our intuition, we just have to trust that it’s for our highest good, coming from our highest-self and more will be revealed as we go down that path. Don’t get me wrong logic has it’s place when you need hard facts, but most decisions in life need to be intuitive, a gut feeling, because our soul knows the way, even if we don’t. And all will be revealed, bit like the pass the parcel game, we just need to take each step, peel off a layer, to let the next one be revealed and enjoyed.
If you can begin today, feel into what feels right for you, begin to trust yourself that you truly know what it right for you, no one else, just start small. What is inside is real and should not be ignored.
Until next time…
Trust yourself, because you and your soul actually want the same thing.
Much love
Elisha 💖
